Hands Off, My Loots!

I was sitting in Dodixie, Moon 20 Station, spinning my ship…when all of a sudden a thought hit me.  “Go find a noob to kill,” my mind said to myself…I agreed, so it was time to prepare.

Preparation was simple, load up the Orca alt with a Wolf, Hound, Cheetah, Rifter, Shuttle, Reaper, and a Hurricane; then pilot him over to Vittenyn while Cyberin brings along the Scorpion.  Of course, that’s a little out of order, because I actually went there in my Gank Catalyst first, killed a Retriever, and then when he came back in a Myrmidon, I decided to do all of the above in order to have a very high chance of getting to kill him.  So, after killing his Retriever…and Concord killing me…the saga begins…

And as always for the people who like a short version…I ganked a guy in a retriever, then killed his Myrm, then killed another guy later in an Incursus.  Seriously…read the rest of the post…it isn’t THAT long

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Two days ago, a corp mate told us a story of how a noob in a velator got 3 or 4 people in a certain system to suicide themselves on him.  We liked this so much that we spoke to the noob…and found out he was not really a noob…just on an alt to mess with people…we liked it, we liked his style…and…we decided we’d work together to get more tears out of at least of of these individuals…so read on

Before I start posting all the Chat logs, I’ll go ahead and give the tl;dr version first because it doesn’t really spoil much for those that want to read the entire thing…just gives a bit more anticipation!  There is a guy named TheWarHound, he decided to Concordokken himself of this alt noob the day before in his Myrmidon…then said “I needed a new ship anyway”.  Because of that statement…we made it our aim to “help” him as much as possible.  Through some excellent social engineering…we managed (we…as in me, 2 corp mates, and the noob alt guy) to get this douchebag to steal from my loot can, and then killed him.

The entire process involved his loot from the day before (when concord killed him), my badger, the corpies, and the alt noob, who I might add…has excellent diplomacy skills.  I took the loot in my badger, 15km outside docking range of a station, then had my corpy kill me after I jettisoned the loot (thought we’d try and see if we could put the loot in the wreck…we couldn’t…so we blew the wreck).  Then one corpy in a Recon cloaked next to the can, while the other 2 of us went to a safe near the station and aligned to him…while the noob alt guy started a convo.

The convo went something like…”hey, this asshole Cyberin just blew up my hauler with your loot in it because I stole from his mining can out in a belt…you can come get it if you want”.  About 10 minutes of diplomacy later the guy actually decided to come get it…and we toasted him…then much Tears fell from the Local Sky.  Chat Logs below (edited to remove all the local chatter that had nothing to do with this event…including the statements by MR. TheWarHound saying that he is an Indian and the White Man pissed him off 200 years ago by invading his homeland…blah blah blah).

As always…with my comments to make sense of things

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A lot of people recently let me know that they enjoyed reading about two idiots I had the pleasure of encountering.   Some people thought they were funny, some people thought they were stupid (I thought both…or maybe just naive).  Either way, one of them (Antiquity1) thought I was the stupid one…and I was met with this evemail upon logging into the game one day.

2009.10.26 01:19 – From Antiquity1
Hey, just wondering if you wanted a PvP match in Assiettes? Message back with a time please.

Needless to say, this sounded like an excellent plan to me, so after a few more evemails…we decided to meet!

2009.10.26 12:37 – To Antiquity1
What type of match? Ship Type?

2009.10.26 17:43 – From Antiquity1
Remember a few days ago you were in your Wolf? How about that

2009.10.27 03:18 – To Antiquity1
Depends on what you plan on being in…

2009.10.27 11:19 – From Antiquity1
Not really sure yet, howabout I turn up in whatever ship I’m using when you get in system and I’ll see if you think thats alright?

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This chat log is both entertaining and boring at the same time…there is no short version, read it all…or skim it if you want…or completely ignore it…but I told someone in corp I’d post it for them to read at work…so here it is

And, if you wanna see me actually being nice to someone…check out the last 18 lines or so.  I left these other guys and found a guy in a belt next to a hauler…he was so fast at transferring ore from his hulk, to his jetcan, and into his Mammoth that I couldn’t even get a chance to grab it…and he wasn’t a douche! Kudos to him!

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