Hands Off, My Loots!

Welcome to the twenty-fifth installment of the EVE Blog Banter, the monthly EVE Online blogging extravaganza created by CrazyKinux. The EVE Blog Banter involves an enthusiastic group of gaming bloggers, a common topic within the realm of EVE Online, and a week or so to post articles pertaining to the said topic. The resulting articles can either be short or quite extensive, either funny or dead serious, but are always a great fun to read! Any questions about the EVE Blog Banter should be directed to crazykinux@gmail.com. Check for other EVE Blog Banter articles at the bottom of this post!

This month’s topic comes to us from @Tetraetc – “Tetra’s EVE Blog” – who asks: “Have Alliances and the sovereignty system limited the amount of PVP and RP potential in Null sec? Imagine a Null Sec where anyone could build outposts wherever. Would the reduction of the alliance game mechanic, and the removal of the sovereignty game mechanics (or the modification of it from Alliance level to Corp level for that matter) force more PVP into Null sec, or would giant power blocs like the NC still form themselves?”

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I live in Syndicate, I don’t know…and currently don’t care.

 

Velocity just decided to open up recruitment for Misfit Toys, which makes me happy as I started bugging him about it a little week ago.  While the small group of us that currently make up the Misfits get along very well (we’ve known each other for a good amount of time in game now), we decided we needed some more people in corp so we can manage to get some decent gangs of our own from time to time and have fun during the day instead of waiting for nightly alliance ops.

I’m not going to copy and paste the recruitment message, but instead I’ll just mention that I am a recruitment officer for the corp and you can contact either myself, Velocity Prime, or Meccros in game; or join the “Misfit Cafe” channel if you are interested.  You can find details about what type of pilots were are looking for in VPs post over at VelociLogic. (also on EVEO Forums)

And…for those of you curious if this is another of my  recruitment scams…I swear you won’t have to pay anything to join…so that kinda limits the scam possibilities a bit (unless of course you are a spy, then there’s a 100mil ISK fee).

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I’ve been busy on my market/hauling alt this week so haven’t gotten much done in the way of funny stuff to post…but I did get a little bored and decided to scam someone out of their corporation shares (they were worthless as he was only worth like 100mil…but meh…boredom).  It’s not really funny at all, but here’s how easy it is to scam people these days.

I found this guy on the EVEO forums while searching for good deals…and this is what it turned into.

Warning…this isn’t funny in anyway, and is probably a pretty boring read…don’t say I didn’t warn you.

[ 2011.02.26 19:23:44 ] SupaSekritAlt > heya, i was curious how many shares you had to sell?
[ 2011.02.26 19:23:47 ] Batuka > hello
[ 2011.02.26 19:23:50 ] Batuka > 900
[ 2011.02.26 19:23:58 ] SupaSekritAlt > and how long you’ve been doing this? current profit margins? etc
[ 2011.02.26 19:24:05 ] Batuka > but i think i wil be only selling 800 of them
[ 2011.02.26 19:25:06 ] Batuka > i have started today and so far i have made 60 million isk but only been doing for a few hours and i only had 100 mill to start with and i have 90 mill in corp wallet buy orders 60 mill in sell orders and 60 mill in corp wallet from profit

Not really much to bother with, but I’ve already started so I might as well finish.

[ 2011.02.26 19:25:47 ] SupaSekritAlt > what are your trading skills like?
[ 2011.02.26 19:26:22 ] Batuka > not very good atm but i am going to train them soon as u see i am a skilled mission/pvp toon but am now trying out trading in a stion
[ 2011.02.26 19:26:52 ] Batuka > i have every trade skill able to be owned in my hanger atm ready to train
[ 2011.02.26 19:26:57 ] Batuka > some already trained

hmm…probably should have lied about that one Batuka…telling potential investors that your skills suck isn’t a very good idea.

[ 2011.02.26 19:27:38 ] SupaSekritAlt > do you have anything to provide as collateral to prevent against scam?  I’ve got tons of isk laying around and have been looking for people to invest in, i’d be willing to do a full 800-900mil, but it’s a pretty big risk with someone new like yourself

Funny enough, this isn’t a lie.  Also, it’s always good to make it seem like you are the one that could be scammed…just makes the whole thing play into your favor just a little bit more.

[ 2011.02.26 19:29:35 ] Batuka > well i do not have anythink to give as colateral exept my reputation if i diddnt have a good reputation i would not have any good uisnes for cheap ships if trading was to fail u would be given your isk back and i would give you your investments
[ 2011.02.26 19:30:01 ] SupaSekritAlt > that’s the point, you don’t have any reputation lol
[ 2011.02.26 19:30:07 ] Batuka > i will be increasing the last 200 shares to 3 mil per share as that way i can control people owning the hsares

When he says this, I’m thinking he’s trying to scam me now.  It’s a good tactic, once someone tells you they are in for X amount, you try and get them in for more.  I was very suspicious…but since I didn’t plan on paying anything anyway…it was a rather moot point.

[ 2011.02.26 19:30:33 ] SupaSekritAlt > would you be willing to send the shares first to insure i get them and don’t get scammed?
[ 2011.02.26 19:30:41 ] Batuka > exactly with youinvesting in me t will gain my reputation and i can get more investors in long term me getting more isk from the market meaning mor eisk for you

My EVE crashes right here…damn game.

[ 2011.02.26 19:33:34 ] SupaSekritAlt > sorry, eve died
[ 2011.02.26 19:33:35 ] Batuka > Batuka  investors wanted http://www.eveonline.com/ingameboard.asp?a=topic&threadID=1474234&page=1
[ 2011.02.26 19:33:46 ] Batuka > Batuka  yes i would be willing to send half you send full ammount of isk i send other half ?
[ 2011.02.26 19:34:24 ] SupaSekritAlt > that doesn’t really keep me from getting scammed, i’d want all the shares up front, then the isk
[ 2011.02.26 19:35:04 ] Batuka > halwell considering if u bought half the shares then i would be at risk of loosing half my corp

Now I’m back to thinking he’s just an idiot and doesn’t know much about corp shares. (50% of shares /= 50% of corp).  Oh, and it’s losing…not loosing…jeez.

[ 2011.02.26 19:36:16 ] SupaSekritAlt > i could give you my limited API key to see that I actually have the cash and such if you’d like first? I’ve got over 18bil in cash right now, and quite a lot more in assets (i’m a trader myself)
[ 2011.02.26 19:36:49 ] Batuka > how about u deposite half the cash then i deposit all shares ?
[ 2011.02.26 19:37:24 ] Batuka > how many shares are you wanting ?
[ 2011.02.26 19:37:28 ] SupaSekritAlt > that doesn’t prevent me from getting scammed either.  Shares are worthless until you get the cash, isk isn’t
[ 2011.02.26 19:37:34 ] SupaSekritAlt > i’ll buy all of them
[ 2011.02.26 19:40:28 ] Batuka > ok so 700 mill for 700 then last 200 i was gona rise to 3 mill a piece would you be ok with that ? just so i can invest more isk

And again with the price raising…

[ 2011.02.26 19:40:50 ] Batuka > i weill transfer the shares first but what is there to say you arnt just going to run of with the shares ?
[ 2011.02.26 19:41:01 ] SupaSekritAlt > what would i do with worthless shares? lol
[ 2011.02.26 19:41:03 ] SupaSekritAlt > and yes, that’s fine
[ 2011.02.26 19:42:03 ] Batuka > 200x 3 = 600 +700 mill isk = 1.3 bill isk kk with that ?
[ 2011.02.26 19:42:17 ] SupaSekritAlt > yeah, that’s fine as long as you make me that 5% a month
[ 2011.02.26 19:43:07 ] Batuka > 5% per month of profit from that month and 15% if left in for 1 year kk ?
[ 2011.02.26 19:43:41 ] SupaSekritAlt > sounds good
[ 2011.02.26 19:43:44 ] Batuka > atm i will give you 800 shares to keep some for me kk ?
[ 2011.02.26 19:44:06 ] Batuka > infact no i will just transfer 900 send me isk for security though
[ 2011.02.26 19:44:44 ] SupaSekritAlt > i’m the one that needs security here, i’m paying you isk, you are giving me worthless stuff.  It’s send all or nothing.
[ 2011.02.26 19:44:59 ] SupaSekritAlt > (though if you want to keep 100 that is fine)

I’m still thinking he’s a scammer with this…he keeps trying to change his deal and get me to send him something (scammer desparation, if you can’t get it all…get something).  But in the end sends me all his shares (I’m still not convinced he’s not trying to scam…because he sent worthless shares trying to get my ISK…I would do the same thing).

[ 2011.02.26 19:45:22 ] Batuka > ok send me isk
[ 2011.02.26 19:45:52 ] SupaSekritAlt > no, thanks for the shares though

After he sent the shares and I said I wasn’t paying he threatened to out me, then said if I give him the shares back he would keep quite, etc.  Went on for about 15 minutes or so while I sat around trying to figure out how to steal his corp from him with the shares.  Turns out after asking in a few channels that I didn’t know how this mechanic worked either…I didn’t know I actually had to be in the corp to start a vote.  So being the nice guy I am (and not wanting this alt burned if I didn’t have to) I gave him the shares back.

Hopefully he doesn’t read my blog

I’m sure most of you have heard me mentioned either on the blog, twitter, in game at the Eve-Bloggers channel, or somewhere else that I can’t think of that I’m always trying to get caught up on my Google Reader.  This is because I sit at work and do absolutely nothing all day…and use that time to read blogs from my Google Reader (because I can’t get to many of them directly from work).

I usually update my list 3-4 times a month using a very nice tool that everyone should use, whether you like to read blogs, or write them yourself.

Recently, I’ve noticed that some of the blogs I like to read aren’t on it…and I have to re-add them every time I update my list, so I figured I’d put this out there and hope those people read my blog as well and get themselves added.

To get added to this massive EVE Blog list, which I must add is offered by Keith from over at I Am Keith Neilson, just point your browser to this link and fill out the form.  It’s pretty straight forward…then I can add you into my list with minimal effort, and that’s always good for me.

I finally got caught up with my google reader…and the last post I had starred was one by Rixx Javix about what he’s got over in his hanger.  This peaked my interest so I decided to checkout what I had across all of my characters (11 of them, not counting anything on my dozen inactive accounts )

Located in Cyberin’s home station, most of these ships are either fit, or waiting to be fit when the currently fit one blows up.  Truthfully, I got a little spendy when I moved out here and I should probably sell quite a few of these since I don’t really fly some of them all the time.  Seriously…who needs 6 Vengeances?…I’ve only flow it once in the past 3 months…

Retribution x 4
Vengeance x 6

As much as I love frigate hulls, I don’t use these two ships much.  Why?  Because I’m not that fond of short range..so the rocket Vengeance is rather meh, and the Retribution only has 1 mid, so I don’t solo in it.  The Retribution is what I normally take out when we go on frigate roam though if we already have an Inty pilot.

Sentinel x 2

Haven’t used them yet as I still need to get the Electronic Attack Ship skill up to lvl 4 for them to be useful, but one of these in a frig gang is always fun.

Drake x 4
Harbinger x 8

I brought the drakes out for shield fleets, but I actually rather prefer my Shield Harbinger fit…so, I don’t use them much.  The Harb is my go-to ship though.  If we are doing an Op and I don’t know what to bring…I’ll most likely be getting in the Harbinger.

Abaddon x 2
Apocalypse
Scorpion

I actually can’t fly any of these yet…the Abaddon’s and Apoc are left over from selling my Cap character recently, and the Scorpion I bought off a corp mate because he loves me and gave me a good price.

Anathema x 3

These are normally used to scout Orcan in when I’m hauling stuff, or when I get bored and decide to go look for a wormhole or something.  They are scan boats…not much else to say.

Arbitrator x 3
Maller x 2

The arbitrator is used for lol fleets (took a shield tanked, only ECM drone version out last night).  Maller is bait…that’s really all it’s good for.

Ashimmu x 3
Omen Navy Issue x 4
Phantasm
Cruor x 2

Must…have…shinies.  The Phantasm is still packaged, waiting to be fit…looking forward to using it because I love my Shield Harb…so I ship that is normally shield tanked and uses laZors sounds like a good deal.  1 of the Nomens is my ratting ship…500dps and can get out of dodge if needed…yes please.  The other ones will be used to get blown up in pvp some day when I get around to it.  And…when isn’t an Ashimmu useful?  <3 Neuts…cruor is there just because it is.  Haven’t actually used it yet because we haven’t had a frig fleet with decent numbers since I got them.

Crucifier x 20
Executioner
Punisher x 20

The Crucifier’s were brought down as a replacement for my Maledictions before I could fly them.  I greatly overestimated the amount of them that I would lose.  I only ever flew one of them…need to sell.  (one of them is a throw away cyno ship, though I normally use a drake for that)  Executioner, i have no clue…don’t remember buying it.  Punishers…haven’t used them yet…but they are here for maybe t1 frig tourneys or just to screw around in.  Might sell those too. (one of these is also a throw away cyno ship)/

Crusader x 5
Malediction x 3

I need to trade out some of those Crusader’s for Malediction’s because I normally fly them in larger fleets.  I’ll keep 1-2 Crusader’s around for small gang work maybe, but I haven’t gotten the urge to go soloing in one…maybe I’ll do that sometime soon.

Hound
Purifier x 4

Cloaky killing shit is fun…’nuff said.

Zealot x 2
Broadsword
Devoter
Curse
Guardian
Scimitar

These are all also left over from selling my cap character (it was boring), need to sell them off as I can’t use them (though, plan on training for Zealots sometime in the next few months, so might keep those and the Curse).

Other Ships not at my home base, or on alts:

Falcon

Orcan doesn’t just fly Orca’s anymore.

Bestower x5
Badger
Noctis
Crane
Bustard
Shuttle x6

Hauling and quick escapes required for living out in Null Sec.  I end up with more bestowers than I need because I buy them on alts to do retarded things like carry a 5K isk module to jita to sell it, and pay 10K isk to contract it to my trade character.

Vigil

You KNOW what that is for.

Primae x 12
Zephyr
Echelon x 12

A little collection, sadly…through all my quiting and starting again, I’ve lost all my snowballs launchers, Zephyrs, interbus shuttles and sadly even a highsec capital or two from back in the day.

Hulk x 2

Useful for my “mining” corps…

Caracal x 2
Punisher
Retriever
Thrasher x 2
Blackbird
Cormorant x 2
Rifter x 4
Buzzard

Random stuff laying around throughout New Eden.

tl;dr: I need to sell a lot of this shit…specially when I realize I’ve got over a Billion worth of ammo in that container, and enough fittings to fit out all these ships 3 times over…and then some…I seem to add extra 0s to the number when I buy fittings…

Alright, I’ve been back in game for 2-3 months now so I guess now is a good time to talk about all the changes since I went on my last little leave of absence…as if anyone actually cares.

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First and foremost…I am no longer in the Ninjas anymore.  Lots of people already know that, but I never officially mentioned it.  I finally bit the bullet and decided to join up with Velocity Prime and the Misfit Toys in nullsec.  Truthfully, 0.0 was the one thing in EVE I’d never tried, and actually never wanted to because cap fights and lag didn’t sound fun at all.

I’m glad I did though, because my new alliance, Clockwork Pineapple, is awesome…and it’s nothing like the 0.0 I imagined.  There’s always fights…plenty of dumb people…and gives fun scamming possibilities (read my recent post on that if you haven’t already…).  The one thing that’s really cemented it I’d have to say would be Clockwork.  For anyone that doesn’t know about them, they were originally in Goons, and a long while ago split off and became their own Alliance…and as far as I know have no plans to do the Sov Game anytime soon (which is good for me).  So, for those few of you that told me recently I suck because I’m a goon now…you are wrong…I’m a gRoon…sort of…technically I’m a Droog…but whatever.

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What else has happened? Lots…

I bought a Cap character to try out, didn’t enjoy it that much and am currently selling him as I write this.  I’m already back up to 5 accounts, though the one with the Cap character will be closed once I sell him off.

Cyb is up to 12.3 Mil SPs (and since I’ve been playing since 2007…I’ve finally decided to stop rerolling since that’s a far cry from what I SHOULD have right now).

My alts are all doing there thing, scouting, trading, hauling, scamming, infiltrating…not much details I can give on all that other than to say once I get this Cap character sold, I’ll be up to a little over 40bil net worth…it’s good being rich again.  For those of you that don’t know…I used to be a very big time trader before I quit EVE last time, and have started getting back into that, running a few investments for TEARS, etc…and will probably be expanding my reach in that field a bit more in the short term future as a way to pay for all the expensive ships I want to get blown up.

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I’ve got so many logs from stuff I’ve done since I’ve gotten back, that I’ve decided I’m not going to post anything with them…because looking through 3 months of logs on 5 characters with 5-10 channels open all the time on each results in an amount of effort I am not willing to devote to it.  So, hopefully I’ll start getting some more Tears and retarded people to post about soonish.

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What am I going to do with Hands Off, My Loots! since I’m no longer a Ninja?

That’s a good question…and actually the reason I haven’t been posting for so long…trying to figure that out has been a pain.  I want to keep the same humorous/asshattery feel as I’ve always had…but realize I no longer have Ninjaing as a way to get those yummy Tears.

Why don’t you go ninja from time to time, you say?  Well..truthfully, I haven’t had fun doing it in a while…the amount of effort it was taking to find people and get them to shoot just got old on me, so I don’t have any desire to do it in my ‘spare’ time (as if I have any with all my alts doing crap).

As a result, the blog will lose it’s “Only Ninja Stuff” theme and become more of a repository for the general asshattery I get up to these days.  Infiltration, scamming, killing sucky people in Nullsec, etc.  I will try my hardest to get lovely Tears out here in Null (it’s possible), and I’m sure the recruitment channel will bring quite a few drops to the bucket as well.  Though, from time to time, those industrialists out there might even get a nice update on what I’m doing on that side of my accounts…maybe.

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And that’s about it for now…though, if anyone has any ideas on stuff they’d like to see me talk about (custom requests, wtf?) or try to accomplish that would result in a funny ass blog post…let me know, I’d love to cater my asshattedness to special projects of interest to readers.

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Oh, one last thing…I’m gonna try and get the rest of the Toys to quit slacking…I’ve only been active for 2-3 months and I’m already the alltime killer on the boards…what gives peeps?